……………………………………………. SWIM? Well maybe! Let’s see if it works.
Looks fun! Me wanna some of that fun! You see, the thing with walking and cycling is that neither of them are swimming and swimming is fun so that is a problem because fun is fun! Who wouldn’t want more fun in their life? What kind of joyless person only wants to reduce everything to some sort of depressing string of practical tasks and rational decisions based on monetary concerns rather than human emotions, social relations or compassion. Surely such a person would sink to the bottom of society completely unable to relate and profit with in a communal environment that requires cooperation! The kind of world in which a person like that would succeed would be a complete hellhole…
Theresa May has introduced new plans to ban the recreational use of laughing gas by 2016! Plans to ban both laughing and recreation completely are in the pipe line for 2017!
But we haven’t all had our humanity sucked out by a privately funded Eton educated straw just yet. Some of us want to swim. But if you swim you really got to be careful. Many of us in the North Devon area do not live close to a municipal swimming pool. So many may be tempted to get their own swimming pool and build it themselves with their own to hands and a spade and a hose but HOLD ON THEIR PARTNER!
WHOA! WHOA THERE BOY! They weren’t lying about horse riding being more dangerous than ecstasy. Its enough to make any sane person think we need evidence based drug policy THERESA!
You need to take it a little easier. You need to slow down a few steps. You need to shut your STUPID mouth and listen for once. You need a proper, safe, and professionally made swimming pool. That is what I did. I got a proper pool with a Paramount Swimming Pool Safety Cover (PSPSC). Beause, funnily enough, when trying to make something safer you trust and follow the advice of people who know far more about it than you because you assume that you are more likely to have opinions based on prejudice than study. A proper swimming pool cover means that when the cover is on a child can wonder out into the garden and fall into the pool and will not die, will not suffer, and will never feel pain again. Which is pretty good.
Then your babies will never die. And through them, you will live forever.